One week ago I disconnected from the fan community, well...almost everyone, as I have been struggling psycologically and with anxiety after an incident in the online fan commuity. This week I have been able to take time to think, reflect on the fan community and everything that comes with it.
For over 28 years I have been a fan of Céline. It all started on April 30th 1988, the day she won the Eurovosion Song Contest in Dublin. "Ne Partez Pas Sans Moi" (Don`t leave without me) was the very first song I heard of her and her voice took me by storm. A few years later she released her very first English album "Unison".
"We stick together we're never apart
Everybody knows who we are
Because we are one we do it in Unison
We come together and stronger we are
Just when the world can tear us apart
We go on as one we do it in Unison"
This is how I feel about our fan community, we have always sticked together. We meet new fans all the time, online or in person when we travel to see Céline. I have been fortunate to meet so many wonderful people, people whom I share the same passion, people that understand, people that know the feelings we have for our idol. Being such a dedicated fan is weird in many people`s eyes, as they have a hard time understanding why and what drives us in this passion. Well....it`s no different from being a football/soccer supporter, no different from being hooked on art or whatever, it`s all about passion, it`s simply a huge part of our lives...it`s all about who Céline is as a human being. Her positivity, her goodness, her loving behaviour towards everybody, her acceptance, her goofiness, the whole package that this woman is....and not to forget.....her MUSIC.
I choose to think that every fan of hers is the reflection of her, fans full of love, full of goodness, full of positivity, and of course the goofiness. I have experienced, through all these years, that unfortunately this is not the case. Like every other fan community (regardeless the artist) there is drama. There are discussions, quarells, disrespect, fights. Not only towards each other as fans, but also disrespect towards the artist. Don`t get me wrong on this, cause most fans are amazing and truly loving people, but there are fans that are disrespectful towards both their idol and fellow fans. Fans that are discontent, fans that critizise their idol, critizise fellow fans, it`s bad talk.....lot`s of bad talk. It`s jealousy, it`s unfaireness. There are fans that think they are better than others, and some are really good at showing it, and they WANT to show it. Like life in general there will always be people that are more fortunate than others, some live close to Céline`s venues, some don`t. Many fans haven`t even been able to see Céline live.
There will always be unfaireness when it comes to being a fan, and that is something we need to accept....when it comes to situations we can not control, and by that I mean what the management is in charge of. What we CAN change is the things we, the fans, are in charge of. By that I mean meet & greets, fan projects, how we act as fans...simply how we appear. I haven`t always appeared the best way.....because by nature I have zero tolerance for unfaireness (what we can control), I have zero tolerance for bullshit and I have zero tolerance for disrespect towards our idol and towards fellow fans. Having these abilities have gotten me in trouble more than once. I have spoken up, protected both fan friends and Céline, simply because of disrespectful and unthoughtful behaviour. There has been some really rough times, but nothing I haven`t been able to handle. This last incident though was more than I could handle. I know I wasn`t very well thought of, for speaking up once again, but I always stand for what I say.
Being a huge fan of Céline I want to see the goodness in people, I want to be accepting, I want to be loving, but when people act unfair and egoistic I fall out.....and it always ends up in hitting back at you, in one way or another.
I HAVE A DREAM.....I have a dream that all fans unite, unite in love, in acceptance, that we all stand together....for our idol. I have a dream that every fan get the chance to one day see our idol live or even meet her in person, because as a dedicated fan there is no better feeling than standing face to face to the one you admire.
If it wasn`t for our idol none of us would have met. Our idol is the one who unites us.....BECAUSE WE ARE ONE, WE DO IT IN UNISON <3
I hope to be back with you all one day, but of the time being I need a timeout, not from our idol and her music, but from the community.
......and I`m proud of it.